I hear the Admin Moderator is up for the job.
Pope Zotius.
Glad to see this is satire.
Not for us to choose. All we can do is pray.
Pope Josey Wales I
1. You gonna go on being uptight shrivel-ass celibate male sexists, or you gonna have women priests?
2. Abortion-contraception-sodomy-fornication-divorce/remarriage, embryo-cannibalism, and you can pick one of your "traditional" Sacraments to round it out to seven. OK?
3 Blah-blah global warming, inclusion diversity sustainability, small carbon footprint, eat the rich, beat and strip the middle class, infantilize/brutalize the poor, social justice (but I repeat myself), stop being mean and just give Israel to the Palestinians, and while you're at it, give Italy to North Africa. OK?
#4, after the break, was probably quite a doozy, but it must have been something like, "Stop worshipping Jesus, he is offensive to Gaia because he was a MAN! OK?"
:oP
Did I come close?
Pope Pompous.
Vote for Pedro.
My best pal’s brother is a Cardinal, and he promised him to send texts during potty breaks when the Conclave meets.
LOL! My husband, 25 yr. old daughter and I got a kick out of that!