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Dunno why homosexuals want to get married, but i assume a lot of it has to do with tax & insurance & hospital benefits. IOW, money.
Why are homosexuals allowed to take the words husband & wife?

Because we gave those words to the government long ago.

In my church wedding, the minister concluded the ceremony with "and now, by the power vested in me by the State of _________, I now pronounce you man and wife." Every wedding I've ever attended has included that part.

We long ago made marriage a civil ceremony sometimes administered by a church. But while a church is not required to have a legally valid marriage, a representative of the State is. I don't know when we did that, only that it wasn't yesterday. It wasn't 1993, and it wasn't when gays started claiming the right for themselves. It's much older than that.

I don't know if it's even possible to undo that, but if we want to have any hope of preventing the government from re-defining marriage, we must first take the institution away from it. So long as it belongs to the State the State will do with it what it wishes.