Date;ine star date 12171.5
Excavation of a tomb near the former New York City of an itinerant day laborer named John Doe reveals that 21st century Americans were not buried in wool suits with neckties but in denim cloth pants and shirts made of what was called chambray.
Rather than the woolen pinstripes alleged to be used ( a complex and advanced fabric) at the time, this proves that the suit of the alleged “Keith Olbermann” dates from some fifteen centuries later, when it was used to hold feminine hygiene products.
LOL
I am authorized to issue a $10 Million Albert Gore Grant to your data sequestration team to finally prove Anthropogenic Global Warming and silence the Right Wing Critics of our work.
Report to our offices at the University of East Anglia w/o leaving a Carbon Footprint. BTW, there was some trepidation among some of our board members that you might be harboring outdated binary gender normative attitudes, however we waited until they left to attend their daily NAMBLA Board meeting, and then confirmed you by voice vote.
We shall be publishing your results tomorrow. Good show and don't miss the Press Party!