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Network New Satellites Collide Over Iraq
The Onion ^ | April 1, 2003 | News in Brief

Posted on 04/01/2003 6:48:29 PM PST by UnklGene

AN NASIRIYAH, IRAQ—In an accident air-and-space-traffic controllers called "inevitable," a CNN satellite collided with an MSNBC satellite over southern Iraq Monday. "Frankly, it's a miracle something like this didn't happen sooner," said Ian Graham of BBC One. "Right now, there are roughly 950 network news satellites crammed into a 125-cubic-mile area of space above Iraq, with more being launched every day." Less than an hour after the crash, an MTV News satellite grazed an Oxygen satellite, temporarily cutting off Oxygen News reporter Lisa Hood's live report on a firefight between U.S. and Iraqi forces near Basra.


TOPICS: Announcements; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS:

1 posted on 04/01/2003 6:48:29 PM PST by UnklGene
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To: UnklGene
an MTV News satellite grazed an Oxygen satellite


Now isn't that 2 of the most useless uses for satellites
MTV News and Oxygen....What the heck are they going to report....sheeesssshh
2 posted on 04/01/2003 6:53:07 PM PST by ThreePuttinDude
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To: UnklGene
Like this story as well....

Saddam Speech Suspiciously Mentions Nelly Song From Last Summer

3 posted on 04/01/2003 6:55:47 PM PST by Textide
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To: ThreePuttinDude
The Onion
4 posted on 04/01/2003 6:56:00 PM PST by GATOR NAVY
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To: ThreePuttinDude
Dude, it's an April 1st gag from "The Onion"
5 posted on 04/01/2003 6:56:57 PM PST by SauronOfMordor (Heavily armed, easily bored, and off my medication)
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To: ThreePuttinDude
dude! it's the Unyun.
6 posted on 04/01/2003 6:57:51 PM PST by OperationFreedom ( www.OperationFreedom.com)
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To: SauronOfMordor
Why?! Look... we both started out with "dude" What a hoot! LOL Great minds huh???
7 posted on 04/01/2003 7:00:08 PM PST by OperationFreedom ( www.OperationFreedom.com)
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To: UnklGene
"... satellites crammed into a 125-cubic-mile area of space above Iraq, ..."


In the first place, TV satellites are over the equator, not Iraq. In the second, this is a troll. But a funny one.

8 posted on 04/01/2003 7:02:36 PM PST by lawdude
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To: UnklGene
Is the ONION owned by the GARLIC PRESS???
9 posted on 04/01/2003 7:34:35 PM PST by Uncle George
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To: UnklGene
CNN satellite collided with an MSNBC satellite over southern Iraq Monday.

Space Junk Alert.

10 posted on 04/01/2003 8:00:27 PM PST by Jorge
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To: Uncle George
ohhhh BOOO! HSSSssss! Bad bad bad...
will someone please take the foul taste from my mouth?
11 posted on 04/01/2003 8:14:49 PM PST by demosthenes the elder (scum will never cease to be scum - why must that be explained to anyone?)
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To: UnklGene
Funny stuff.

Though, where's the part about the debris falling and causing civilian casualties?
12 posted on 04/02/2003 12:26:28 PM PST by Yankee
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