Welcome to the marriage experience for many if not most men. No matter what you say or do, it's always wrong. Eventually, this leads to a passive-aggressive "yes dear," then doing whatever it is that you wanted to do in the first place, so it's ultimately self-defeating for the would-be controller. At least your kids, your house, your assets and your income for life until she remarries wasn't on the line. Be thankful for that.
A woman agrees to share your life but really wants to control it and run it. Bad for any relationship. As woman with sex laws of today I would as man never trust any woman. Imho date rape is usually buyer’s remorse and guilt next day.