Tweet of Clay ... Mark Steyn

Steyn Online ^ | 17 June 2015 | Mark Steyn

[Rummyfan]

I've reached that happy stage in life where I'm like the bewigged judge at the Old Bailey: "Who are these 'Beatles' to whom the defendant refers?"

"I believe they're a 'popular beat combo', m'lud."

So I have no very clear idea who Amy Schumer is. Never knowingly seen or heard her. But I understand she's boffo with the millennials, and one must respect a hit. So I was interested to see turn up in my inbox this headline from Salon:

Amy Schumer's one tweet that captures the Rachel Dolezal controversy

Naturally, I clicked. And this was it, the Tweet that singlehandedly "captures the Rachel Dolezal controversry":

Oh, no, wait. First, "the editors" (for this appears to be a Salon editorial) preface the Tweet as follows:

Leave it to Amy Schumer to sum everything up.

Gotcha. So now here's the Tweet that is the grand summation of l'affaire Dolezal:

Wait, we can be black if we want?

[Rummyfan]

First they came for the Jews and I did nothing.
Then I decided okay, I'll do something for the Jews.
But then they came for the transgendered and I did nothing, so the Jews said screw off.
So I said okay, I'll do the TransWoman of the Year luncheon.
But then they came for the non-colored women of color and I did nothing, because by then I was getting a bit of a headache...

[JudyinCanada]

Seems to me that this new trans-racial thing would completely eliminate racism.

Blacks can be both black and white, whites can be both white and black. There’s nothing left to complain about.

[Lonesome in Massachussets]

Rumpole: Your Lordship, he’s making my client out to be some sort of James Bond!
Bewigged Judge: James Bond?
Rumpole: A character in fiction, M’lud, who spends an inordinate amount of his time sleeping with air hostesses.
Bewigged Judge: Well let’s confine ourselves to the facts in this courtroom.

[NonValueAdded]

Hey, if Lieawatha can self-identify as American Indian, why can’t RD self-identify as Black? After all, Korben Dallas self-identified as a meat popsicle

[NTHockey]

I now recognize the source of all my stress and consternation. I am a young handsome billionaire trapped in a poor old body. Today, I’m buying me a $2.2 million yacht and after loading it up with the finest wines and booze, the best food and a bevy of beautiful nymphs, I’m off around the world.

[ez]

I play sax and guitar in a local beat band. Is it possible for me to self-identify as black while I am playing horn and as white while strumming the guit? I wish to be Charlie Parker and David Gilmour. I think I will change my band’s name to The Oreos.

[Nervous Tick]

>> There’s nothing left to complain about.

Oh I can always find something to complain about.

But I do know that on the next census form, I’m going to put down “transracial ambiguous” where they axe for Race.

I’m looking forward to it. :-)

As a bonus, I may put down “cis” where they axe for gender.

[Adder]

Yeah....I can say I feel like Donald Trump but it don’t make me rich....

[RipSawyer]

You’re also trapped in out of date thinking. You won’t get much of a yacht for 2.2 million dollars now, more like a large rowboat.

[Road Warrior ‘04]

Hey, I’m 5’6”, weigh in at 320 lbs. and I’m skinny!

[bert]

Oreos have been trans racial for sometime now

[ProtectOurFreedom]

That was one of the best TV shows ever.

[zeugma]

If Mossad really wanted to mess with Asghar, they'd break in again and replace his missing shoe with a matching one, but in a smaller size. They're cunning like that.

hahahahahaa

[Disambiguator]

My sandals self-identify as sneakers, so they’re more comfortable being worn with socks. Take that, fashion nazis!