That's nor true, most have a good memory of this and your memory is lacking.
The reality is that in the fall of 2009 Obama expressed doubt about sending the additional 65,000 troops and the right wing, led by Cheney, attacked him saying he was "dithering". Do a Google search with 3 key words Obama, dithering, and Cheney and you can find all those articles and FR threads from back then.
You may be pissed off now, but you were also pissed off then
As for the Rules of Engagement, the prez doesn't do that. Those are found in the Army/Marine Counter-insurgency manual, which General Petraeus(who wrote his master's thesis at Princeton on counter-insurgency) had rewritten and the main man involved in that was Col. John Nagl(who was the Rhodes Scholar of counter-insurgency).
One of the complaints about Obama was that he was undermining the COIN mission in Afghanistan because of his drone strikes.
Obama ended up with same team in Afghanistan that Bush had in Iraq in 2007/2008 for the surge. Gen Petraeus in command. Gen Allen 2nd in command. And Ryan Crocker as ambassador.
Insofar as the POTUS hires and fires the generals that set such rules, he does indeed “do that”.
As for the Rules of Engagement, the prez doesn’t do that …