"What?"
"Knife!"
"AAAAAAHHHH!"
Posted on 10/27/2014 4:24:30 AM PDT by maddog55
"What?"
"Knife!"
"AAAAAAHHHH!"
My anthropomorphic sensitivity to the plant and animal kingdoms has caused me to morally abstain from eating food. I now receive all my nutrients directly from the air and filtered non-GMO water.
What?! No ‘Tool’ posting, yet?
Disgustipated - Tool
And the angel of the Lord came unto me,
snatching me up from my
place of slumber,
and took me on high,
and higher still until we
moved in the spaces betwixt the air itself.
and he bore me unto a
vast farmland of our own midwest,
and as we descended cries of
impending doom rose from the soil.
one thousand, nay, a million
voices full of fear.
and terror possessed me then.
and I begged,
“Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?”
And the angel said unto me,
“These are the cries of the carrots,
the cries of the carrots.
You see, reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day
and to them it is the holocaust.”
And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat
like the tears of one millions terrified brothers
and roared,
“Hear me now,
I have seen the light,
they have a consciousness,
they have a life,
they have a soul.
damn you!
let the rabbits wear glasses,
save our brothers...can I get an amen?
can I get a hallelujah? thank you, Jesus.
...
Agree re: boiled, but fried is pretty yummy! I can hear the little okra pieces scream as they hit the frying pan.
Glad to see I’m not alone. I have never developed a taste for boiled okra (or those snails the French eat), but some prefer it. Fried, pickled, and in gumbo it’s OK and very tasty.
Some varieties of onions make me cry when I peel and slice them. And any peppers hotter than a jalapeno I avoid. The hotter-than-hell varieties are downright deadly not to mention the lingering effects on old guys like me. Makes me wonder if they would kill the Ebola virus :).
Someone told me Prince Charles talks to his plants...
And then they’ll all start plotting their revenge...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rrG-42uCDj4
[actually, it’s a really good show]
:)
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