"Because I'm the Rodney Dangerfield of American politics. I don't get no respect. First off, that's "Secretary of State Kerry," to you, Barkeep.
Secondly, I served in Vietnam.
Lastly, is this where I can get me a brewski?
Sure thing Mr, er... Secretary Howell! Will Lovey be having one, too? Remember not to drink and hunt, what with you gitting a huntin' license here...