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To: Seizethecarp

I was a spy too when I was younger. I even got a couple girls to believe it.


3 posted on 05/28/2014 7:47:38 AM PDT by driftdiver (I could eat it raw, but why do that when I have a fire.)
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To: driftdiver

Harry: [holding Simon at the edge of an aquaduct] Son of a bitch, Did you think you can elude us forever, Carlos, huh?

Simon: Hey, you got the wrong guy! My name's Simon! Just let me go. There's no need to kill me. I haven't seen your...

[Harry and Gib remove their masks]

Simon: face. No, no, no I didn't see it, I didn't see it! [realizes that it is Harry]

Simon: Oh, it's you! Hey, you still interested in that 'Vette at all?

Gib: Hey, Carlos? Game's over. Your career as an international terrorist is well documented.

Simon: No...

Gib: -Oh, yeah.

Simon: No...

Gib: Oh, yeah!

Simon: No!

Gib: OH, YEAH!

Simon: No, I sell cars! That's all! C'mon, I'm not a terrorist. I'm actually a complete coward, if I ever saw a gun, I'd...

Harry: [Harry takes his gun out and points it in Simon's face]

Simon: [Whining and pleading] Oh God, no, please don't kill me. I'm not a spy. I'm nothing. I'm navel lint! I have to lie to women to get laid, and I don't score much. I got a little dick, it's pathetic!

[Harry and Gib gave Simon a weird look, then Simon pees his pants]

Simon: Wha, uh, oh God. Would a spy pee himself, huh? Please, I'm not worth a bullet. Oh, mercy sir!

Harry: [Disgusted] Get the fuck out of here. Just go, just beat it.

Simon: No, no, as soon as I turn, you're gonna shoot me! You're gonna shoot me, you're gonna shoot me, you're gonna shoot me!

Gib: [Gib and Harry get into their van] Get lost, dipshit. [fires a few rounds into the ground near Simon]

True Lies (1994)

9 posted on 05/28/2014 7:57:59 AM PDT by Bubba_Leroy (The Obamanation Continues)
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To: driftdiver
I saw John FU Kerry on CBS this morning and he said
that everybody knew Snowden was a trained spy.

That this was nothing new.

BTW, were you ever in st cloud, Mn? I “met” a spy one drunken night.

17 posted on 05/28/2014 8:19:23 AM PDT by BarbM (Portuguese Dog--Kenyan president)
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