“How did they launch the Hellfire?...”
“Hey, Ishfal, I want you to help me kill Americans.”
“Alahu akbar, yes, dead Americans is good. What can I do?”
“Well, it’s simple Ishfal, take this hammer and nail...”
“Yes, Muhamid. But, what can I do with a nail and hammer to kill Americans.”
“Listen you unholy heap of camel dung, I will tell you...but you must listen if you want to kill many Americans.”
“Yes, Muhamid...”
“Now, Ishfal, take the sharp point of the nail and and place it on...see that shiny little piece of metal right there?”
“yes, Muhamid, I see it...”
“Take the sharp point of the nail and place it on the shiny piece of metal. Then, take your hammer and drive the nail into the shiny little piece of metal. Remember when you helped your build the goat pen. You have to hit the nail very hard, praise Allah, and you will kill many Americans.”
“Like this Muhamid...?
“NO, NO, Ishfal...not yet...wait, wait until I am gone...uh...I have to go see what kind of goat stew we will be having tonight. Wait until I am around the corner of the building.”
“OK, Muhamid.”
“Allah will be proud of you Ishfal. Alahu akbar!”
“Alahu akbar, Muhamid. Return quickly as I am hungry, and would like to know what kind of goat stew we will have tonight.”
An 18-year-old Islamo, named Ishfal blew himself up launching a hell fire missile and then appeared before Allah.
He said, “Oh, Allah, I did your bidding, but I have a request. Since I’m only 18 and spent all my time in terrorist training school, I never was with a woman. So, instead of 72 virgins, can I have 72 prostitutes?”
Allah regarded him for a moment, then replied, “Actually, Ishfal, the 72 virgins are here in heaven because people like you murdered them before they could experience the pleasure of sex. So you’re here to service them. Since they’re virgins, they’re quite sexually hungry; and frankly, you’ll be on a constant and very exhausting duty.”
The bomber responded, “Well, I guess I can live with that. How hard can it be to keep 72 women satisfied for all eternity?”
Allah replied quizzing, “Who told you they were women?”