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Whitey's dream forum
Friday, May 10, 2013
By: Howie Carr
Whitey Bulger has obviously decided it’s time for a Hail Mary pass.
He’s trying to get on “60 Minutes,” like his brother before him. Now we know why he shaved his beard.
Of course, it won’t happen, at least not until after his trial. But you can’t blame the accused serial killer for wanting to taint the jury pool, a jury of his peers, and what better jury of his peers could he get than the “60 Minutes” audience?
He’s 83, which puts him on the younger side of the “60 Minutes” demographic, which is 80 to death.
And we know he’s a big fan of the show. In fact, Whitey was watching in Santa Monica the night in 2008 that his old partner, Johnny Martorano, went on and talked about what he would do to his light-in-the-loafers pal if he ever got hold of him.
Whitey was so angry he got out a legal pad and began dictating his own memoirs:
“I have been driven to this by the lies of John Martorano and seeing his insane interview on 60 Minutes was the last straw.”
To which Martorano replied, “Why didn’t he just change the channel?”
It’s the perfect venue for Whitey. Like the Globe, it’s not really journalism — remember their hoax story in 2004 about George W. Bush and the Texas Air National Guard? These days “60 Minutes” more closely resembles a cross between MSNBC and the second hour of “Good Morning America.” A mix of Pravda and show-biz schmaltz.
As far back as 1992, Whitey’s little brother Billy benefited from the show’s lax standards. The 65-inch-high tyrant known as the “Corrupt Midget” was portrayed as Jimmy Cagney in “Yankee Doodle Dandy.” As part of their faux journalism, they even let the CM throw out a line about the mass murdering, drug-dealing, bank-robbing Whitey:
“He’s my brother. I care about him. I encourage him to come by (my house) all the time.”
Oh, isn’t that touching? Of course, the problem now is, “60 Minutes” won’t be able to find a lot of people willing to go on the air and talk about how “it’s just plain fun to have a leader with blood in his veins.”
That was what the 100-year-old reporter from “60 Minutes” said about Billy Bulger back in 1992. Maybe the new reporter could say something like, “It’s just plain fun to have a gangster who doesn’t mind draining the blood out of his partner’s girlfriends’ (that’s plural) veins.”
Don’t worry, Whitey, they won’t fact-check anything you say. That’s “60 Minutes’” motto: Some stories are just too good to check out.