Well, you and your wife have had more medical crap to put up with than most people. It's a good thing you are smart so you can figure out what's wrong and do something about it. Good wishes to you,
Marcella
I wouldn't have figured out a lot of this without help both from GOD and from reliable websites. I've helped a couple of cousins who developed the anxiety part of it as well as my dad. The neurological issue seems to be one of genetics. My dad was almost what would be termed a social phobic. He didn't dislike people as such but rather disliked being around crowds. Like me in crowded situations even at family gatherings he could only tolerate so much background noise. You hear people talking but trying to pick out any given conversation of follow one is difficult. You can have perfect hearing as far as that goes and still have the interpretation issues.
BTW I did lern another thing in Levinsons book. In most cases a persons fear of heights is a symptom of Vestibular Issus. It is the brains internal correction and self preservation that demands a rsponse to the danger it sees. IThe brain senses lack of balance. In my case I had to take two years Occuoational therapy as a kid for eye/muscle coordination. I have poor balnce to the point of using a cane now. But I’ve always had a fear of heights even before they knew about the coordination issues.
Foam ear plugs of the type common on construction sites are less conspicuous and reduce noise nicely. They are disposable and cheap, and you can keep a pair or two in your jacket pocket or glove box, just in case. (We use them a lot on oil rigs...)