[GSWarrior]

John Barleycorn claims another victim.

[Tax-chick]

shattering the glass he was carrying in his left pants pocket.

Unexpected.

[SaraJohnson]

Wow! How tragic.

[Da Bilge Troll]

fell on an empty glass of beer

It was either a glass of beer or it was empty -- it can't be both!

[LibWhacker]

Wow, okay, I'm not carrying empty glasses of beer in my pocket anymore... ummm, WAIT!... I never do that anyway... Besides, I'm trying to imagine exactly how I would have to fall and land in order to break a glass that did happen to be in my pocket, such that the glass shards could be driven deep into my leg or abdomen and sever my femoral vein/artery. The only thing I can come up with is if I took a flyin' swandive out of a second story window and landed on rocks below. Just sayin'. The cops might want to look at this cockamamie story very, very closely.

[Venturer]

Are you hppy to see me or is that a glass of beer you have in your pocket?

Rolled up newspaper or a banana would have been a better idea.

[dfwgator]

Note to self: Never put a beer glass in your pocket.

[Revolting cat!]

Attention shoppers: The young widow is now available!

[Texan5]

At the risk of being mean-I think the deceased deserves a Darwin nomination-that was realy, really dumb...

[MortMan]

Interesting that it’s not an “empty glass”, but an “empty glass of beer”! Sad for the man’s family, including the newly widowed newlywed bride.

[Cyman]

Well we know two things for sure. Since it was in Brazil it was caused by global warming and of course, it was Bush’s fault.

[xrmusn]

Some ‘old’ comedian (Skelton?) had a routine of a drunk with a bottle of whiskey in his pocket.
Someone pushes him down and he gets up and feels liquid on his arse.
Crying, he says damn, the guy with him says “Quit moving around and the bleeding will slow down”...

“BLOOD? Thank God, it is only blood”.

[Secret Agent Man]

not celebrating the groom dying, but this may have just been the happiest married man ever.

[fieldmarshaldj]

Sad. RIP.