“I thought the same thing. She never did get that she killed a human being and her life is still all about her emotional comfort.”
Let her get pregnant just once and carry it to term. Then she will get it!
I remember what Darth Sideous said in “Return of the Jedi”
“Young fool... Only now, at the end, do you understand... “
I can think of another quote that might fit a circumstance like that. “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” I’m sure it would bring it home for her and with some strength and some support she might be able to take that pain and transform it into a real awakening.