I have a theory about McDonald’s, that is, everything they make is all one thing, and in the back they have this big vat full of this stuff, these little molds combining, like SPLURT ‘Hamburger!’ SPLURT ‘Malt!’ SPLURT ‘Paper box!’ SPLURT ‘Here’s your change, thank you!’
-Steve Martin
I have a different theory about McDonalds. You see, the food isn't good enough to justify the massive global presence. I mean, they are everywhere. So if it's not for the food, what? I think I know. It's a secret government plot. Inside the basement of every McDonalds is a crack squad of Navy SEALS. If the word is given (i.e. "Take down France!") those SEALs emerge and quickly and efficiently get the job done. Governments know this, so they don't really mess with the US unless they are the few that have no significant McDonalds presence. For example, Iran, Cuba, Libya, etc.
It's just a crackpot theory I made up but now that I've voiced it I expect Michael Moore to run with it.