I was perfectly comfortable giving several thousand dollars to a close relative struck by undeserved disaster, UNTIL they* said that when they* got on their feet, they*'d donate it to a charity. NO. NO. NO. If you ever ARE on your feet (that's probably several years away), you can donate it back to ME. That was the money I'd been saving for a shed for the backyard, which I really need and still don't have.
You’ve confused “giving” and “loaning”. If you loan someone money, you expect something in return. If you give money, they can go on a drunken binge with it and you won’t care because it is THEIR money now.
Yep, that's why I don't loan money, except as considering it a gift I don't expect to see again. It saves stress all around. If they aren't close enough that I would want to gift it to them, they don't get it. For them to be asking in the first place means that no bank thinks them even remotely creditworthy at any rate of interest.