On the second day of Kwanzaa Øbama gave to me
Two Jaily birds,
And a Marxist in a red tree.
On the third day of Kwanzaa Øbama gave to me
Three Dixie Chicks.
Two Jaily birds,
And a Marxist in a red tree.
On the fourth day of Kwanzaa Øbama gave to me
Four Lenin busts.
Three Dixie Chicks,
Two Jaily birds,
And a Marxist in a red tree.
On the fifth day of Kwanzaa Øbama gave to me
Five fel-on-ies.
Four Lenin busts,
Three Dixie Chicks,
Two Jaily birds,
And a Marxist in a red tree.
On the sixth day of Kwanzaa Øbama gave to me
Six Castro jumpsuits.
Five fel-on-ies,
Four Lenin busts,
Three Dixie Chicks,
Two Jaily birds,
And a Marxist in a red tree.
On the seventh day of Kwanzaa Øbama gave to me
Seven Mao pajamas,
Six Castro jumpsuits,
Five fel-on-ies,
Four Lenin busts
Three Dixie Chicks,
Two Jaily birds,
And a Marxist in a red tree.
Well done!
Got this in an email:
Twas the night before Kwanzaa And all through the ‘hood,
Maulana Karenga was up to no good.
He’d tortured a woman and spent time in jail.
He needed a new scam that just wouldn’t fail.
(”So what if I stuck some chick’s toe in a vice?
Nobody said revolution was nice!”)
The Sixties were over. Now what would he do?
Why, he went back to school — so that’s “Dr.” to you!
He once ordered shootouts at UCLA
Now he teaches Black Studies just miles away.
Then to top it all off, the good Doctor’s new plan
Was to get rid of Christmas and piss off The Man.
Karenga invented a fake holiday.
He called the thing Kwanza. “Hey, what’s that you say?
“You don’t get what’s ‘black’ about Maoist baloney?
You say that my festival’s totally phony?
“Who cares if corn isn’t an African crop?
Who cares if our harvest’s a month or two off?
Who cares if Swahili’s not our mother tongue?
A lie for The Cause never hurt anyone!
“Umoja! Ujima! Kujichagulia, too!
Collectivist crap never sounded so cool!
Those guilty white liberals — easy to fool.
Your kids will now celebrate Kwanzaa in school!”
And we heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight:
“Happy Kwanzaa to all, except if you’re white!”