It has taken a long time for me to accept the fear of turbulence as well and I am still not over it completely.
But a friend years ago reassured me that the Boeing jets are built very very strong and that turbulence was so much a danger as a pilot’s response to it.
That said, I love it when an airline pilot reduces speed in a turbulent zone because as I understand it is speed that is a big factor. I would rather be late and have a smooth flight than be on time and be trembling in fear when I arrive.
I guess thing I most need to know is: if the plane is really bucketing and bouncing around the sky, how much danger is the aircraft really in? I know small planes do that kind of thing even on relatively normal days, but they don’t fly at 500+ mph either. My one friend who is a pilot isn’t much help, since he was a warthog driver, and that thing will fly with major parts of the fuselage missing, so he has a distorted view of flight.