Obama announces energy cuts using CFLs, night vision goggles (satire)

ExurbanLeague.com ^ | June 29, 2009 | Jon

[inkling]

Aiming to keep the focus on climate change legislation, President Barack Obama put in a plug for administration efforts to drastically reduce energy use by lamps and lighting equipment.

In the past, the president emphasized using CFLs, LEDs and other low-energy bulbs to reduce the nation's carbon footprint. But today Obama asked American consumers to remove light bulbs altogether and use night vision goggles instead.

"I know night vision goggles may not seem sexy, but this simple action holds enormous promise." the president said, equipped with the high-tech eyewear. "Seven percent of all the energy consumed in America is used to light our homes and businesses," he continued, standing with the also-goggled Energy Secretary Steven Chu at the White House.

Not since Jimmy Carter famously wore a sweater for a televised address has a president employed outerwear to promote a reduction in personal energy use...

[Islaminaction]

Good one.

[George from New England]

We will all need “night vision goggles” when Obama’s cap-and-trade fees turn our lights out.

[givemELL]

Buy a few variac (variable AC)controllers and reduce AC voltage to incandescent bulbs by 7-10%, and, in so doing, increase their useful life by major percentages. Energy saving, mercury containing bulbs do not last as current inrush at 120 or more volts is not sustained well, and in my experience, they burn out quickly due to normal on/off cycles and are quite uneconomical. Their life can also be extended by using a variac, but not as much as an incandescent bulb. Some of Edisons’ bulbs from the early 1900s are still burning at low, but useful, levels today in museums.

[Personal Responsibility]

While this is a joke, while on the campaign trail Obama did claim the US dependence on foreign oil could be broken if we only inflated our tires.

The only reason this is satire is that Obama hadn’t thought of it yet.

[Buckeye McFrog]

yes, but if you have Variac installed, make sure you instruct your spouse DO NOT PUT CFL’s IN THEM! Trust me on that one!