Childless: Some by Chance, Some by Choice

The Washington Post ^ | 11/28/06 | Nancy Rome

[ark_girl]

I work in IT. In that woman's defense, you can never completely not work. Otherwise, you'd fall too far behind technology. If I were to have a kid, I might look into working from home or working part time...enough to maintain skills. But, you can't just not work if you want to be able to come back once the kids are in school.

I'm a firm believer that, stay at home mom or not, Moms need to be employable in case something catastrophic happens to the dad. But, that's another thread.

[beaversmom]

My mom and I went out to eat at a buffet type restaurant one night. Like most of those kinds of restaurants, you pay before you eat. There was a large group ahead of us--2 adults (man and woman) and a bunch of kids. The boys were all dressed in button down dress shirts. I can't remember if the girls were dressed similarly or not. Anyway, I thought it was some church youth group. Somewhere along the line between paying and sitting down, it became apparent that this was one family. We only saw the mother from the back at first but when we saw her profile, she was visibly pregnant. The kids were stepping stones. In line for the cashier a couple of the older boys were being silly, but when they sat down they were all very well behaved. We counted 11 + the one in the womb--so 12. I've never seen a family that large in person.

[Tax-chick]

Yes, I am lucky to avoid work functions! My husband's employer doesn't seem to go for events that require the attendance of anyone other than the employee. He goes out to lunch with his coworkers and salespeople fairly often.

[ichabod1]

Stepping stones - yes, that's a dead giveaway. It's probably not so rare that there ARE large families, but when you see them all at once, that's what gives you a little start.

[Finger Monkey]

if you don't have the children, then the burden falls on someone else

hmmm

I am a worthless human being because I have failed to use my womb.

I shall go kill myself right now.

Some people choose not to have children out of wedlock.And since I have not yet found someone to whom I could bear to hitch my wagon for the rest of my life, I cause a "burden" to others.

Someone else has to sacrifice, so you can buy Prada.

Wow.

Just, wow.

So, I gather you were rejected by a woman who did not want to bear your children and chose shoes over you?

[Barney Gumble]

I am a worthless human being because I have failed to use my womb. I shall go kill myself right now. Some people choose not to have children out of wedlock.And since I have not yet found someone to whom I could bear to hitch my wagon for the rest of my life, I cause a "burden" to others.

Just great, my disclaimer was not inclusive enough and I apparently offended someone. I'm not talking about an individualized case of a women who did not have children because of some particular reason. I'm talking about a general phenomenon where many women are declining to have children, because kids annoy them, or they are expensive, or they will make them fat.

It's more of a common occurance in Europe. The result is fertility rates as low as 1.2 in parts of Europe, like Spain (about 2.1 is needed to maintain population). So what happens when the native population rapidly declines? Many bad things. I'll let you figure it out.

[Finger Monkey]

much better

mmkay.

kissy