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Ticket to Ride

The upcoming election is only the latest thrill in an ongoing thrill ride not topped by any other thrill ride you've ever been on, if you're into political thrill rides that is. There was the long, slow, boring climb on the lift hill of "x41", which followed the "Rockin' Ronnie" section, into the slight transitional pause at the top of the hill, that being "Election '92", followed by the first drop that nobody could've ever envisioned! Man, talk about gut-wrenching!

Well, I'm not usually queasy on rides, but let me tell you, I puked a couple of times during that section of the ride. (stop that...it was neither fun nor funny and I ruined a perfectly good pair of shoes!) There was so much built up inertia with so many dips, hills, loops and helixes, the harsh sounds of screeching brakes, centripetal acceleration as well as those moments of zero acceleration...WHOA...my stomach is turning again just thinking about it all. Complaining to the management did no good. It was all too much and I could go on for days about the horrors of that section, but I don't want others to loose their lunch rehashing that adventure.

Well, after "The Never-Ending Ride From Hell" phase, we then entered into the "Bush Push" phase of the ride. Now, keep in mind that everyone was told at the begining of the "Bush Push" phase that we'd be moving along and to forget some of the dips we'd experienced before and that this would be a totally new ride. Nevertheless, it still seems like some of the hills were the same to me, but then again, I could be wrong.

There were more dips and hills, though they were much easier on the stomach. I've yet to vomit, which is always a good thing. There were also the mind numbing double loops, which very few enjoyed and where only stern resolve kept my lunch in line, and those led into several helixes.
Much of this section of the ride was accompanied with the gleeful shouts of enthusiastic riders who were so happy to have such a neat, orderly ride experience. I felt rather blasé myself, overall, about much of this section of the ride.
Also playing in the background through the loudspeakers during this section were the cacophonic sounds of rockets bursting in air, patriotic tunes and other such things. While a nice sentiment it was soon left behind. A good thing about the sound though was that no one could hear, much less pay attention to, the usual shrill screeches that accompany such ride sections.

There were, of course, the usual dolts with their arms, legs and heads hanging over and out of the cars. All that flailing about just made their extremeties go numb from the loss of blood, but we've all seen that before on the ride so it really was nothing new. The majority of those riders seemed to be cut and paste jobs, all saying the same thing and shouting the same thing others like them have been saying for years even though they have a new look about them.
There was even one guy, believe it or not, who recently fell off the ride from such blood loss to the head! "Yaaaaaah!" was all you heard oh his way down. The riders still don't know what happened to him. There was another guy even more recently on the ride who started shouting "Bring It On" and I thought to myself "You Couldn't Handle It If It Was Brought".

So, while we're going through the slow down, I quickly jotted this quick script down for posterity, be it received well or not. I watch amazed during this slow down at all of the folks on the loading platform jumping nimbly around, on and off and in and out of the various cars of this constantly moving thrill ride. I also heard someone shout out...

Could 2004 be one of the defining elections in American History?
I couldn't help myself but respond...Brother, where have you been? This ride hasn't even started!

P. S. An effect I greatly enjoyed was the addition of the visual tunnels plastered with patriotic colored lights and explosive special effects.
(which is pretty neat if you're into......Fire, fire.)

I broke down and wrote something Slim. Hope you enjoy and figure out the analogies.

23 posted on 02/21/2004 2:51:53 AM EST by philman_36

Good stuff, Phil...I'll respond later when I have a bit more time...MUD