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My son, Justin, is a student at Timberview High School. On October 6, 2021, a student pulled out a gun and shot 4 people.

At 9:21 AM I received a text message from him that a teacher was shot and they were in lockdown.

I immediately called him. I told him to silence his phone and text me so that I could hear what was happening and he would not give his position away. From that point forward, we spoke in whispers. When he fell silent, he texted and I listened.

I had just started as the VP of a branch of a national company and had to pull myself together, lock my personal shit down, and keep calm for my son. As I explained what was happening to HR and the team, it gave me a few moments to compose before I jumped into my car and drove like a NASCAR monster to my son an hour away.

At 10:04, the text messages show that he thought he was hearing gunshots. Through the speaker in my car, cranked to 40 so I could hear everything, it sounded like booms. As it had several times before when I was in life or death situations, everything started moving in slow motion.

I whispered I love you to him more times in that hour than I had in an entire year.

Thankfully, it was the police clearing the hallways.

Nothing will crush your soul faster than having your child whisper that he does not want to die like this and you are helpless to do anything about it. His urgent plea was so haunting I memorialized it in a text to my sister that day. I think on it when I get frustrated that he didn’t finish his chores or when he stays up too late on his videos games. It tempers my pique.

It was a full 40 minutes from the time it started to the time help reached my son’s classroom. The shooter had already fled.

Only my prior experience in risk management and several life/death situations (including an active shooter situation in 2019) helped me stay focused.

In between I love yous, I did two important things: first, I asked my son what room he was in, continued to ask questions so I could gather information, assured him and his friends that help was coming and to stay alert. Second, I gave him pointers on how to survive (block the door, cover the windows, barricade if possible, look for weapons, if breached, throw objects and then rush the shooter with anything you can use as a sheild). My son has been to the range and knows how to handle a weapon. If he got his hands on it, he would have known how to shoot it.

No one knows how they will respond in the event of a true crisis until they are in it. By providing him with instructions, I increased his chances for survival by 50%.

If the Uvelde police let the parents in and they had been killed, there would have been lawsuits galore. Confusing desperate parents with a potential accomplice could lead to a lot more injured or dead. I’m not saying I agree with it, but I understand it.

As it is, the police did not follow protocol. They are supposed to neutralize the threat as quickly as possible. Standing around with their d!cks in their hands for almost an hour is not acceptable.

My boy is home safe tonight. For those 19 families, life will never be the same. My family knows the pain of burying a child. It never leaves you.

You can help you children survive by training them to be a survivor. Prepare them for emergencies. Teach them about situational awareness. Even just talking through scenarios provides their brains with instructions on how to survive, so that they do not freak out or panic should danger come near. Their brain can latch onto those conversations and respond quickly. The faster your response rate, the greater your chances for survival.

Obviously, those innocent little angels did not stand a chance through no fault of their own or their parents. The monster was already in the gates. The system set up to protect them failed.

Last, but not least, never EVER give up your guns. The system will not protect you. It is up to you to ensure that you and your family survive.