Old couple in room. Wife looking at herself in long mirror.
“You know, everything has gone downhill. My hair is gray, I’ve got dentures, my t’s are sagging, my a is sagging, hell, everything is sagging. Can you think of anything left that’s good?”
Husband looks her up and down.
Well, there’s nothing wrong with your eyesight.
Husband buys an expensive negligee for his wife for their 50 anniversary. He puts the box on the bed and when she gets home, he tells her, “Honey, I’ve left you a special present in our room. I want you go take off your clothes, open it and then come let me see what you think.”
She giggled, and went into the bedroom. Upon opening the box, she sees the gift-wrapper had forgotten to remove the price tag, and she was shocked at how much money he spent when they could have made better use of the money. So she walks out naked instead, planning to scold him.
“Well, what do you think?” she asks.
After a few blinks of his eyes, he replies, “I think for that much money they could have at least ironed it!”