Posted on 09/02/2017 8:41:42 PM PDT by TBP
These 10 rules will help you make emotions work for you, instead of against you.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify emotions (in both yourself and others), to recognize the powerful effects of those emotions, and to use that information to inform and guide behavior.
It begins with learning how emotions work, but it goes much further. Specifically, how do you start putting that knowledge into practice?
If you'd like to make emotions work for you, instead of against you, pay attention to the following "10 commandments."
I. THOU SHALT PONDER THY FEELINGS.
Emotional Intelligence begins by learning to ask the right questions, like "What is my current mood, and how might that influence my decisions today?" or "What are my strengths and weaknesses?"
This is one way to begin building self-awareness, which will yield valuable insights that can be used to your advantage.
II. THOU SHALT LEARN FROM OTHER PERSPECTIVES.
When listening to others, don't focus on right or wrong; rather work to understand how perceptions differ. That includes learning to take negative feedback, which can expose blind spots and lead to self-improvement.
III. THOU SHALT LEARN TO "PAUSE."
"The pause" is as simple as taking a moment to stop and think before you act or speak. (But beware: while easy in theory, it's difficult to practice.)
Don't expect perfection. But practice consistently, and the pause will prevent you embarrassment and could save countless relationships.
IV. THOU SHALT PRACTICE EMPATHY.
Instead of judging or labeling others, work hard to see things through their eyes. Ask questions like, "Why does this person feel this way?" and "What's going on behind the scenes?"
Do this, and you'll enjoy a clearer understanding of the world around you, and build deeper, more connected relationships.
V. THOU SHALT PRAISE OTHERS.
By focusing on the good in others, and then specifically telling them what you appreciate, you inspire others to be the best version of themselves.
VI. THOU SHALT APOLOGIZE.
"I'm sorry" can be the two most difficult words to say. But they can also be the most powerful.
Acknowledge your mistakes and apologize when appropriate, and you'll develop qualities like humility and authenticity, naturally drawing others to you.
VII. THOU SHALT FORGIVE.
Refusing to forgive is like leaving a knife in a wound--you never give yourself the chance to heal.
Instead of hanging on to resentment while the offending party moves on with his or her life, forgiving gives you the chance to move on, too.
VIII. THOU SHALT NOT FREEZE OTHERS IN TIME.
Refuse the temptation to judge others too quickly, without considering context and extenuating circumstances. Remember that everyone has a bad day (or even a bad year).
Instead, make it a practice to consistently and honestly re-evaluate your relationships, and you'll be sure to get the most out of them.
IX. THOU SHALT CONTROL THY THOUGHTS.
When you experience a negative situation, you may won't have much control over your feelings. But by focusing on your thoughts, you can control your reaction to those feelings.
As the saying goes: "You can't stop a bird from landing on your head. But you can keep it from building a nest."
When you focus on your thinking, you resist becoming a slave to your emotions. Instead, you acknowledge those feelings and can then move forward in a way that's in harmony with your goals and values.
X. THOU SHALT NOT STOP LEARNING.
Emotional intelligence isn't about achieving perfection, or reaching a certain level of "EQ." It's about continuous learning and growth.
Yes, it's often when you've "mastered" one of these 10 commandments that you will make your greatest mistakes. But it is how you handle those mistakes that will determine how truly emotionally intelligent you are. ■
The Duke sez “Never apologize. It’s a sign of weakness.”
You really believe this? Then there is the Bible.....
Bookmark
Uh, no....
Measure twice, cut once.
I measured twice, cut twice, and it is still too short!!!
Why do you bother?
You must have known you were gonna be attacked and likely called a “heathen” :)
Some people on here are straight out of 1600s Salem and they are the conservatives that scare even ME!!
But for my part, thanks for posting this. They are very good tips that tackle important ways to better yourself.
Funny how God gave us these great brains to understand how to think so abstractly and how to better ourselves but to bible thumpers, it’s a mortal sin to try and do so.
=
That's quite an attack on Christians...now go back to your prayer rug and worship allah/satan.
Emotional Intelligence is stupit.
Stupit I tell you.
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." Proverbs 9:10
If you want to sort out your feelings, feed on God's Word. Yeshua is the Way, the Truth and Eternal Life. Let your "feelings" line up with this truth and all will be well.
Lost me on I - ponder feelings.
Being feelings centered and focused is at the heart of Marxism/progressivism/liberalism/Democrats - and always leads to WRONG DECISIONS!!!!!
Because FEELINGS and FACTS are more often than not POLAR OPPOSITES!
The LEFT accomplishes its goals only by getting the weak and ignorant to focus on and act from their feelings............
What an @@@hole.
I’m Catholic but you’re probably one of those demented ####s that hate Catholics.
I’m against backwards hicks who think it’s the 1600s.
Also, I’m on the 300 list. As a conservative, I dont lean on others like a bitch to keep a website that i like open.
Where’s your name?
YIKES!
You sure do swear a whole bunch of vile and foul language in your rants against Christians.
Thanks for outing yourself.
My training says number 4 should say sympathy and not empathy. Empathy is feeling what others feel. Sympathy is understanding what others are feeling.
Great advice. For liberals who are ruled and dominated by their unchecked emotions. Most of the rest of us learned from these lessons, either by example or by our own failures and recoveries.
Nice...
Those are good commandments. Liberals break most of those. They sure don’t know their own emotions much less the emotions of others or how to control their emotions.
In fact the whole answer as to how liberals make themselves and the people around them lies with their low emotional intelligence.
You’ll never be able to persuade if you can’t understand the other’s perspective. Understanding it doesn’t mean that you agree with it, but it means you understand how the other person got to his/her view.
bkmk
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