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~*~*~*~THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD~*~*~*~

Posted on 03/31/2017 5:57:04 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

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To: Lucky9teen

41 posted on 03/31/2017 11:58:15 AM PDT by wyokostur
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To: sodpoodle

I know a peg-legged pirate who used to be a foot taller..


42 posted on 03/31/2017 12:02:15 PM PDT by llevrok (A group of baboons is called a "congress." Just sayin' .....)
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To: SERKIT

Jerry Maddow, you never looked so good :)

Bet Rachel is jealous of that ‘stache.


43 posted on 03/31/2017 12:24:29 PM PDT by upchuck (U have not lived today until u have done something for someone who can never repay u ~ John Bunyan)
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To: Lucky9teen

The Dog’s Diary - Day 170

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

The Cat’s Diary - Day 983 of My Captivity

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a “good little hunter” I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of “allergies.” I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now ...


44 posted on 03/31/2017 1:27:43 PM PDT by Oatka
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To: pa_dweller

LOL, thanks


45 posted on 03/31/2017 2:05:48 PM PDT by P.O.E. (Pray for America)
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To: pa_dweller

As it had me; thanks for the link again, though my children shall go hungry tonight for my spending too much time there and missing billable hours. Oh well, if they live, they might laugh about that as well some day. Totally worth it. ;-)


46 posted on 03/31/2017 2:28:10 PM PDT by Moltke (Reasoning with a liberal is like watering a rock in the hope to grow a building)
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To: Lucky9teen

47 posted on 03/31/2017 5:13:13 PM PDT by mrsmith (Dumb sluts: Lifeblood of the Media, Backbone of the Democrat/RINO Party!)
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