[Mrs. Don-o]

I find it deeply understandable that people can long for kids with a powerful deep yearning that seems almost undeniable. My husband and I have had our share of reproductive woes, including two miscarriages and a failed would-be adoption (the birthmother chose against the adoption plan almost at the brink of birth.)

Terrible pain and heartbreak.

But every method of getting a baby is not OK. Having a baby by another man, other than your husband, is reproductive infidelity. It violates the unique and exclusive nature of the marital bond, even if the lawful husband thinks that's OK. It also intentionally, in a pre-planned way, "normalizes" the violation of the natural father-child bond--- something which has been preempted, sold off, bought off, split off, fragmented, minimized and shredded almost to nothing in our society as it is.

To put it in relation to God: we are not the masters of the sources of life, but ministers of the Divine design.

Any drug, device, therapy or surgery which restores marital intercourse to regain its natural fertility, is great, and it recognizes the sacred unity of the couple. But I would argue that paying some guy to masturbate into a jar so you can get pregnant, does not.

[Vigilanteman]

I am not saying your view is wrong, but it is extreme. Of all the various Christian denominations out there, I believe Catholics and Mormons have the most strict views on issues of sexual morality and I don't believe either one has issued a statement forbidding the use of sperm banks.

In the first several months of our marriage, my wife and I had difficulty getting pregnant even though we were trying regularly and often, seldom ever missing a day and as many as 3 or 4 times some days.

But no luck, so we checked into possible medical causes. It turned out that all we needed was a change in positioning and shazam! Three beautiful daughters in less than 4.5 years.

Those few short months taught us to be more sympathetic to couples who weren't so fortunate.