$25 a plate would be a steel from what I gather.
My wife decided to host a wedding her daughter a few years ago. Against my counsel to just give them money as their relationship was troubled from the start, she spent about 25K for an affair for about 120 people. Frankly, I was not enthralled with her daughter and less so of her friends. The upshot is they are now divorced. We are far from rich and part of that money came from retirment funds, the rest from borrowing.
Aside from that story, the point is there is a whole industry of leeches out there from planners to caterers to resort sites who see dollar signs as soon as someone walks through the door with stars in their eyes. Those stars turn into meteors which hit them in the head a few days after the event. My advice is plan on small events and give money to form a financial foundation for the new couple.
You are exactly right.
Being an old Firehouse cook, and the cook at our American Legion Post, I am used to cooking for a lot of people, so when my son got married I cooked the food,, The same for when my daughter got married. The greatest expense was the hall rental and the band. Still both of these weddings were in the $6,000 dollar range. My son married a girl who’s parents didn’t have much and they couldn’t afford the wedding, so old dad got stuck with the bill. The wedding was cheap , The Divorce cost me $30,000, but it was that or lose my Grand daughter. A friend of mine took out a 2nd. mortgage to pay for his daughters wedding. To me that is pretty ridiculous. If you haven’t the money there is no shame in having a small wedding.
Putting on a show to impress the Jones’s is BS.