[Opinionated Blowhard]

Emergency responders in Kodiak say they had to overcome the challenges of a cliff as well as an incoming tide to rescue a woman who fell 60 feet onto rocks.

This sounds like something out of a sitcom. And as the tide swept her out into the ocean after her 60 foot fall onto the rocks, she was madly trying to keep her head above water so her cigaretted didn't go out and she could finish her text message.

[Erasmus]

...and all the while keeping her kicking legs out of the jaws of the dreaded Alaskan shark.