[cbkaty]

Pay no attention to those people around me....

I won a Nobel Peace prize and...I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night....

[dfwgator]

Gee, does that mean Obama is going to celebrate Śmigus-Dyngus too?

[B-Cause]

BREAKING NEWS:

This just in:



Obama wins the Heisman Trophy after watching a college football game today!!!

Obama has been awarded the Heisman Trophy after watching a college football game! His name was submitted for the award by George Soros just moments before Obama actually watched part of a football-game on television aboard Air Force One. Obama learned about the Heisman award while travelling to accept an Academy Award for his appearances in post-election campaign ads. Obama said: "I will accept the Heisman trophy in the name of all the minority players who are being denied the opportunity to play college football simply because of their grades, lack of ability, or incarceration ."

The White House also announced today that Obama has reluctantly been persuaded by his staff and the ACLU to present himself with the Presidential Medal of Freedom for the outstanding deeds he hopes to accomplish sometime in the future. A decision on his Congressional Medal of Honor has been temporarily sidetracked because of minor technical issues concerning eligibility.

In the meantime, the President's decisions on the economy, health-care, and the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq have been delayed indefinitely due to the president's busy schedule of public appearances. When asked what involvement he will have in the healthcare-bill named in his honor, Obama replied: I will probably vote "Present".