Posted on 02/29/2008 12:48:16 AM PST by guitarist
-These psychologists and shrinks don't distinguish between beating your kid in anger and lovingly disciplining him (with spanks of medium force, and without parental rage). I would guess most parents mostly do the latter. Those who do the former, we would agree, are bound to have a psychopath on their hands when their kid grows up. I'm sure if you could divide the spankers into these two groups, you would easily see that the careful spankers get much BETTER results than the non-spankers. And the "flying into a rage" beaters get the worst results of the lot.
-The whole idea of measuring social phenomena with "scientific" studies is a bit ludicrous. The BEST they can do is suggest a link. They don't prove a link. Do the authors of these studies not understand the difference between causation and correlation? Maybe the 10% of people who never spank have (supposedly) better kids because they are richer, or better educated--and turn out better kids due to these factors. Maybe their kids would turn out even better if they did spank them occasionally for willful disobedience, or some of the spanked kids would have turned out even worse if they had not been spanked.
Sheesh! We know the non-spanking secularists want to take our kids away from us or throw us in jail for spanking them. Can't we just throw them in jail for professional malpractice instead for foisting bogus articles like this on the public??
Have at it!! Guitarist.
I'm not against parental discipline but let's be honest--how many kids, when being spanked, think "Mommy/Daddy LOVES me!" ?
I bet Barney Frank was spanked a lot. And when he was a kid, also. (rimshot)
Not too long ago, I read how terrible it was to tickle you child.
You left out the Barf Alert.
But he does know HIS behavior has consequence and that I love him and demand GOOD behavior.
... said Murray Straus, a spanking expert ...
ha ha
I don't have kids but work with kids with mental, emotional and drug issues. While I don't believe health workers like myself should have the right to discipline kids--we don't, thankfully--I do believe parents have that right.
At the same time, I think it's foolish to deny that in some cases, parents go too far. There's just too much history.
In the case of this study, I don't think it's ridiculous to believe that SOME children are affected by even lesser amounts of physical discipline, and am bemused by those who apparently think all kids react the same way to the same discipline. That makes no sense. I've gone through things in my youth that I rarely even think about; kids I see have gone through far less and are deeply disturbed by it. Many kids have gone through far MORE than I did--by leaps and bounds--and have come out perfectly OK.
The troubling truth is that kids aren't robots. That's why parenting is such a hard job, and why we don't have hard and fast rules for bringing up kids.
On one had we have these people telling us that there is no such thing as deviant sexual bahavior. On the other, we have them telling us that spanking us can lead us to it. Well...
All I can say from my experience growing up is that:
1) Spanking worked and worked well. And it was generally the un-disciplined, un-spanked peers of mine who ended up going down the wrong path, particularly when we were of the same socioeconomic status.
2) No such deviance on my part.
3) I will spank my children, the anti-spanking crowd screetching as they may.
He’s way more sensitive than my son, and the parenting background difference is night and day: never left mommy’s arms, sleeping in parent’s bed, fed by hand, not potty trained, etc.
ROFLMAO
I think as long as they are warned that a spanking is coming for certain behaviors, and then the spanking is given as punishment instead of some sort of revenge, then the child will learn boundaries. How you regulate parents that are out of their freakin minds is beyond me, but not allowing corporal punishment gets you the brats we have today.
Dang, where's my wife? I'll get the belt...
"He that spareth his rod hateth his son; but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes (early and while young)." Proverbs 13;24.
Failure to discipline is child abuse, loving "chastening" to which you are referring is an expression of genuine love to protect the child from danger (the stove is hot) and to protect them from evil (violence against your sibling is evil -a form of the impulse to murder).
God, who created the womb, forms the child in it, Psalm 139, and explained child rearing by Solomon knows infinitely more about it. The people with the highest "self esteem" are prison inmates.
If I have one all-purpose truth for bringing up kids which I learned from my experience, it’s that moms who smother their sons—who turn them into Momma’s boys with all that implies—are the invisible abusers. They are emotionally crippling their sons, destroying their ability to be independent men, and they do it with enormous self-righteousness.
After all, who would want their kids to be less deviant than their friends?
if 90% of toddlers are spanked, how large would your sample size have to achieve a power to determine such how much such a vaguely described procedure would have on such a murky endpoint? It certainly would be likely that spanking was at least as universal, if not more so, in past generations, but there is some at least anecdotal perception that this kind of sexual activity is increasing. Maybe there are a lot of other, more important factors?
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