I totally agree that Carlisle is better (to me) than Whistler's mother. It's just that the latter became such an icon, right away.
I actually find Whistler's white works somewhat boring. Not a lot of drama in white....
Would have loved to be a fly on the wall in THOSE sittings. Story is, as Carlyle was coming out, he met a little girl going in to be painted. "Puir lassie! Puir lassie!" he murmured.