Hey, **it happens!
Posted on 01/28/2006 3:15:56 AM PST by Graybeard58
In Estacada, Ore., where doctor-assisted suicide is legal, a man's attempt at ending his life took a bizarre turn when he ingested a prescribed drug mixture from his doctor and said goodbye to his family, only to awaken from a coma three days later, feeling fine and asking, "What the hell happened? Why am I not dead?"
In Hereford, England, a couple celebrating their 80th wedding anniversary -- he's 105; she's only 100 -- attended a press conference where they attributed their success to his two words, "Yes, dear."
In Perrinton, Mich., a member of a family whose home's uncapped, 3-inch PVC roofline vent pipe led down to a toilet drain was surprised one morning to sit on a toilet and discover a squirrel looking up at her.
In Canada, because of deepening budget cuts, a suicide hot-line announced it could only accept calls weekdays from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.
The victim of a party prank while severely intoxicated, a 39-year-old man in Portsmouth, N.H., finally sought help from a rescue squad to remove the padlock that had been locked around his scrotum for two weeks.
A man put a bucket of 8,200 pennies for sale on eBay for $25,000.
At the Livermore Library in San Francisco, where a colorful mosaic in the entryway floor commemorates 175 of the world's greats, the artist had to be recommissioned to come back and correct in the mosaic the spelling of 11 of the 175 names, including "Van Gough," "Shakespere," "Michaelangelo" and "Eistein."
In Benton Harbor, Mich., a woman admitted she walked through a riot-wracked neighborhood on a night of unrest and sold small rocks for $1 each and bigger ones for $5 so that African-American protesters would have something to throw at police.
In Bridgeport, Conn., a 29-year-old woman found to be having repeated sex with an 8-year-old playmate of her daughter's defended herself, saying he was the aggressor in the relationship, that he had ordered her to dump her adult boyfriend and she was simply going along.
Police in Athens, Tenn., were called after a husband became angered at the way his wife was mowing their lawn and was chasing her around the yard with a power chain-saw when officers finally arrived.
At a discount store in St. Petersburg, Fla., a 48-year-old dwarf, Molly Beavers, told authorities she was fired because she didn't smile enough. When she explained to a store manager it was because she suffered from partial face paralysis, she claims she then was told, "That is no excuse."
In London, because a typist accidentally left out the word "not" in a court verdict, a 38-year-old called before a judge a dozen times "for public inebriation," was ordered to stay drunk in public or face being jailed.
In Anderson, Ind., one day after a 57-year-old biking enthusiast celebrated the end of a 2,400-mile bike trip across America to show that heart bypass surgery couldn't stop him, he sat down and died of a heart attack.
"......a 57-year-old biking enthusiast celebrated the end of a 2,400-mile bike trip across America ....... he sat down and died of a heart attack."
I see his problem. He shouldn't have stopped riding. It was resting that killed him.
"The victim of a party prank while severely intoxicated, a 39-year-old man in Portsmouth, N.H., finally sought help from a rescue squad to remove the padlock that had been locked around his scrotum for two weeks."
- ROFL
Will he be suing for wrongful life?
Hey, **it happens!
That's the one that cracked me up too.
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