Posted on 01/26/2005 8:33:27 PM PST by I got the rope
Ok everyone...I received a company email today that I would have to attend a mandatory training class called "Managing Differences" or as it is commonly known as Diversity training. Being the well informed FReeper that I am, I know that this is obviously bull$h**! It's values training.
I really want to have some fun with this one, so I need some ammunition so I can take over the class and bend them toward my evil VRWConspiratorial ways! Any ideas? What should I expect?
Shoot spitballs at everybody and claim it's part of your culture?
Did you "offend" somebody or does this training apply to every one?
Did you know knee-to-groin is the traditional greeting of the Ibawabu?
That's why you will be identified immediately. May I suggest that you take the position of an agrieved "victim" Liberal for this.
Should be some great theatre.
BTW, my forte at work was to make sure the speakers from Finance and/or Human Relations were left unable to answer my question.
It always followed a simple format ~ beginning with "after being nickel and dimed to death with bizarre salary adjustment policies for the last 20 years, I am sure your proposal will be a breath of fresh air. Now, can you quickly compute what the average increase will be without going through all those scoring methods and balancing points?"
Some of them actually try to answer the question. I can recall only one time someone tried to tell the truth.
refuse to sit next to anyone with red hair.
My husband had to suffer through that training at a company that he worked for before he went back into the military. He made the girl in charge of it cry.
That explains why Ibawabu males jump away from you when they say hello.
It applies to everyone.
But first, Nabutu!
Wear pink and swish.
LOL. I thought about telling everyone that voted for George Bush.
He pretended to have a TERRIBLE ALLERGY cold. He took along a small box of tissues.... put some pepper in hankerchef, sniffed it and kept sneezing and pretending to cough very loudly.
He said he even took along some eyedrops and said he had to use the drops because his eyes were so sore.
He said it was hoot... NOBODY would sit near him and when he blew his nose and acted like he was weak and shakey, the "instructor" took pity on him and told him to stay as long as he felt that he could.
At that point he thanked everybody for their KINDNESS and he left acting VERY sad about having to miss the meeting.
We have laughted about this several times. Nephew is quite a "card" anyway. I told him he should have been an actor many times. : ^ )
ROTFLMAO. That's one's already taken I think. One of my coworkers(male) wants to wear a dress or a skirt.
Sounds like a perfect place to declare your personal opinions and claim tolerence from those that uphold diversity: prolife, for traditional family and marriage, parental rights, and allowing the military to run military campaigns.
Sorry to hear that.
If you're white, claim to be black, or vice-versa, or whatever race you choose just as long as it's not really your own. This will really screw with the "diversity" folks' heads.
The one I had the misfortune to attend was totally lecture with no visual aids. I sat with my eyes closed. When asked by the presenter (during a break) why my eyes were closed I said to her that it let me tune out visual distractions and better concentrate on 'the message'. She thought that was the cat's @$$, and didn't bother me about it afterward. I managed to get myself some serious rest time for the remainder of the session.
HAAAAHAAAAA!!! Good one.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.