It’s too strung out at 4+ min. A song like this should be done in 2:50. Put the track into an editor and see if you can manually cut the excess bars. For instance after the vocal intro>4 beats>verse. If doing it in an editor results in some choppy sounds use the result as a template and go back to the multimate track.
I’ve got 10 or 15 songs of my own that are the best of the God knows how many I’ve written. Some of them would have benifit ed from the above advice. Song writers can get real windy.
Thanks for the comments! I actually thought of that critique, but ignored myself.