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$400,000 Study of Duck Genitalia Defended
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 5 Apr 2013 | John Semmens

Posted on 04/06/2013 11:15:26 AM PDT by John Semmens

click here to read article


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To: faithhopecharity

Rather than either or, why not neither nor of the spending choices?


21 posted on 04/06/2013 12:39:34 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

yes of course you are right

(but if you cut off all their harmful and/or wasteful spending, and especially the most ridiculous parts of it, then the administration will have a giant collective heart attack for sure....”cold turkey withdrawl” may be too difficult for them to withstand...?)


22 posted on 04/06/2013 12:50:37 PM PDT by faithhopecharity (()
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To: John Semmens; All
Photo & Video Sharing by SmugMug
23 posted on 04/06/2013 12:57:53 PM PDT by SWAMPSNIPER (The Second Amendment, a Matter of Fact, Not a Matter of Opinion)
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To: John Semmens

Gotta be done by a “duck d*ck doctor.”


24 posted on 04/06/2013 1:01:09 PM PDT by Vermont Lt (Does anybody really know what time it is? Does anybody really care?)
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To: John Semmens

Not Safe For Minors

“Do you quack like a duck
When you f#@%, do you quack,”

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=eY-sDKtIhbc


25 posted on 04/06/2013 1:11:20 PM PDT by wxgesr (I want to be the first person to surf on another planet.)
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To: John Semmens

Its not going to the ducks. It’s going to line some politician’s pocketbook.


26 posted on 04/06/2013 1:33:13 PM PDT by freekitty (Give me back my conservative vote; then find me a real conservative to vote for)
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To: Hoodat

Is that Long Duck Dong?

Automobeeeeeel?


27 posted on 04/06/2013 2:06:06 PM PDT by EQAndyBuzz (The reason we own guns is to protect ourselves from those wanting to take our guns from us.)
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To: EQAndyBuzz

LOL! You beat me to it!


28 posted on 04/06/2013 2:19:14 PM PDT by Califreak (11/6/12 The Day America Divided By Zero)
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To: John Semmens

“Yes, but first you must induce the duck to have an erection.”

Didn’t you get the memo?

Duck Viagra is our next Federally Funded research project.

To be a balanced study, we must evaluate ducks in their winter habitats, say Rio or Cabo.

We will need AT LEAST $500K-$600K.


29 posted on 04/06/2013 2:28:02 PM PDT by BwanaNdege ("To learn who rules over you simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize"- Voltaire)
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To: John Semmens

“Yes, but first you must induce the duck to have an errection.”

Half the money went to the fluffers.


30 posted on 04/06/2013 2:29:53 PM PDT by EQAndyBuzz (The reason we own guns is to protect ourselves from those wanting to take our guns from us.)
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To: Robert DeLong

http://www.masslive.com/living/index.ssf/2013/04/university_of_massachusetts-amherst_professor_patricia_brennan_defends_her_research_in_face_of_fox_n.html

University of Massachusetts-Amherst professor Patricia Brennan defends her government-funded duck genitalia research in face of Fox news online poll, Internet debate


31 posted on 04/06/2013 2:37:16 PM PDT by BwanaNdege ("To learn who rules over you simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize"- Voltaire)
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To: John Semmens

They funny thing is the government does fund crap like this. How else would they know what to put into their grade school studies of multiple sexualities?

1.4 Million Stimulus Dollars for Sex Study
http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2012/05/15/Stimulus-Money-Funded-Sex-Study


32 posted on 04/06/2013 7:51:43 PM PDT by Maelstorm (This country wasn't founded with the battle cry "Give me liberty or give me a govt check!")
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To: John Semmens
Yes, but first you must induce the duck to have an erection.

"Duck erection, people erection! You Americans and your erections! In DPRK we have no erections!"


33 posted on 04/06/2013 8:04:23 PM PDT by COBOL2Java (Fighting Obama without Boehner & McConnell is like going deer hunting without your accordion)
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To: John Semmens

This is what happens when we have allowed the government access directly to our paychecks. It is purely criminal that people’s very own income is taxed and far far beyond what the founders fought against the king for. It will die soon!


34 posted on 04/06/2013 8:06:56 PM PDT by fabian (" And a new day will dawn for those who stand long, and the forests will echo in laughter")
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To: John Semmens

All I know about ducks and sex I learned from Mary Prankster.


35 posted on 04/06/2013 11:36:05 PM PDT by TChad (Call them Oppressives, not Progressives.)
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To: BwanaNdege
Oh okay thanks. So there is some truth to the story.

I love how she concludes that male ducks rape female ducks. While it may indeed be interesting I still am not sure how we will benefit from this research. However, I will watch to see if this research does lead to mankind's, or even duckkind's, benefit.

This brings us back to the ducks. Male ducks force copulations on females, and males and females are engaged in a genital arms race with surprising consequences.

Male ducks have elaborate corkscrew-shaped penises, the length of which correlates with the degree of forced copulation males impose on female ducks. Females are often unable to escape male coercion, but they have evolved vaginal morphology that makes it difficult for males to inseminate females close to the sites of fertilization and sperm storage.

Males have counterclockwise spiraling penises, while females have clockwise spiraling vaginas and blind pockets that prevent full eversion of the male penis.

36 posted on 04/07/2013 8:11:24 AM PDT by Robert DeLong (u)
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