Posted on 04/21/2024 6:46:48 PM PDT by DoodleBob
Ah, the office – a place where language goes to get dressed in a suit and tie, only to trip over its own shoelaces. Here are 21 phrases that we’ve all heard ad nauseam, and if we’re being honest, wouldn’t miss if they were banished from the corporate lexicon forever:
#1. “Touch Base”
Because nothing says “I don’t actually play baseball” like using a sports metaphor to schedule a meeting.
#2. “Reach Out”
What are we, in a 90s boy band? Just say “I’ll send you an email” and leave the emotional ballads out of it.
#3. “Circle Back”
Less reminiscent of a productive workplace strategy, more an endless loop of doom where nothing ever gets resolved.
#4. “Synergize”
The verbal equivalent of a corporate trust fall. It’s supposed to mean teamwork but sounds more like a new age retreat.
#5. “Think Outside the Box”
If we had a nickel for every time this was said, we could construct a very large, very square box to trap the phrase in forever.
#6. “Leverage”
Originally a physics term, now just a fancy way of saying “use.” Because why use simple words when you can sound like a Wall Street tycoon?
#7. “Paradigm Shift”
Nothing quite like invoking the cosmos to describe changing the office printer.
#8. “Deep Dive”
Not a thrilling ocean adventure, but an overly long meeting about statistics. Bring a snorkel.
#9. “Bandwidth”
Unless you work at NASA, you’re probably just talking about time. Spoiler: nobody’s downloading you.
#10. “Low-Hanging Fruit”
Great for describing apples, less so for the easily achievable tasks that somehow still aren’t done.
#11. “Move the Needle”
Unless we’re all suddenly DJs, can we agree to just say “make progress”?
#12. “Boil the Ocean”
An epic quest to accomplish the impossible, or just corporate speak for trying to do way too much? You decide.
#13. “Take it Offline”
Because apparently, talking in person is now akin to being in airplane mode.
#14. “Win-Win Situation”
A mythical scenario, much like a unicorn, where everyone is happy and nobody’s spreadsheet gets rejected.
15. “On My Radar”
Unless you’re air traffic control, let’s stick to “I’m aware of it.”
#16. “Ping Me”
Not a game of table tennis, just a request for a message. Sadly, paddles are not involved.
#17. “Drill Down”
A phrase that makes you feel like you’re in for some serious dental work, rather than a closer look at the details.
#18. “Game Changer”
Overused to the point of meaninglessness. Changing the game or just changing the PowerPoint template?
#19. “At the End of the Day”
Spoiler: It’s night. Also, a filler phrase that’s the verbal equivalent of shrugging.
#20. “It’s on My Plate”
Because “I’m working on it” wasn’t foodie enough.
#21. “Ecosystem”
Unless we’re discussing the rainforest, can we agree our office plant doesn’t constitute an ecosystem?
So, next time you catch yourself using one of these phrases, take a moment to laugh, then say what you mean. After all, clear communication is the key to success, not the ability to speak in buzzwords.
I wish people would use the term 'stakeholders' more often. It forces people to think about everyone who has something at stake.
I've witnessed more than one major project or process get completely shut down after months of effort because the initiators completely disregarded a stakeholder who had to slam on the brakes.
I've seen months of meetings, software written, and training provided, all to have it come to a screeching halt when Legal asked "what the hell?" and had to inform the process owners that "we still need the current way to be able to walk into court with it."
Accounts Payable and Accounts Receivable are two other stakeholders that get left out with severe consequences. I quickly got myself off of one project after the project leader responded to the question (not from me), "Did you run this by Finance?" with "We're going forward and will have them align when we're implementing it." Needless to say Finance simply said "No. That does not meet the legal requirements for audits." 18 months later and that was the quiet end of the project.
Overuse and misapplication of the word “actually” in business situations is similar to the word “like” in social situations. Gaaawk!
😂👍🏻👍🏻
“Never let the perfect be the enemy of the good.” I learned this from Morton Blackwell.
…and “So…”
“It forces people to think about everyone who has something at stake.”
I think you clarified my thinking on why I like the term. And corrected my spelling of it - just one word. It is fairly new to me so that is probably why I don’t like it.
“I’m a man, but I can change, if I have to, I guess.”
23. Take it to the next level
And here to stay: Hybrid work model
Lean into.
Translated: Pretend this irrational “ask” can be accomplished with the same amount of time resource, and be willing to work additional time to compensate.
“Somebody give me a reason to hate “stake holders”. That was a new one for me”
I did my MBA 1979 - 1982. I bought an outstanding book on corporate strategy around 1980. I remember well the chapter that exposed me to the idea of “Stakeholders” which went far beyond customers and employees.
So it’s an old term. I don’t know when it originated, but I’ve got that 1980 reference. That was quite a while ago.
Never let the perfect be the enemy of the good. A sound principle I learned from Morton Blackwell.
“A sound principle I learned from Morton Blackwell.” But overused
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