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Schlick: Now this afternoon we’re going to shoot the scene where Scott gets off the boat on to the ice floe and he sees the lion and he fights it and kills it and the blood goes pssssssssshhh in slow motion.

Conger: But there aren’t any lions in the Antarctic.

Schlick: What?

Conger: There aren’t any lions in the Antarctic.

Schlick: You’re right. There are no lions in the Antarctic. That’s ridiculous! Whoever heard of a lion in the Antarctic? Right. Lose the lion.

McRettin: Got to keep the lion. It’s great!

Schlick: Lose the lion.

McRettin: Great. We’re losing the lion. Rewrite. Lose the lion everyone. That’s fantastic,

Scott: What’s this about our losing the lion?

Schlick: Well, Kirk, we thought perhaps we might lose the fight with the lion a little bit, Kirk, angel.

Scott: (loudly) Why?

Schlick: Well, Kirkie, doll, there are no lions in the Antarctic, baby.

Scott: (shouts) I get to fight the lion.

Schlick: It’d be silly.

Scott: Listen, I gotta fight the lion. That’s what that guy Scott’s all about. I know. I’ve studied him already.

Schlick: But why couldn’t you fight a penguin?

McRettin: Great! (falls over)

Scott: Fight a rotten penguin?

Schlick: It needn’t be a little penguin. It can be the biggest penguin you’ve ever seen. An electric penguin, twenty feet high, with long green tentacles that sting people, and you can stab it in the wings and the blood can go spurting psssssshhhh in slow motion.

Scott: The lion is in the contract.

Schlick: He fights the lion.

McRettin: Even better. Great. Have a drink. Lose the penguin. Stand by to shoot. (falls over)

Schlick: Where do they have lions?

Conger: Africa.

Schlick: That’s it. Scott’s in Africa. As many lions as we need.

McRettin: Great!

Schlick: He’s looking for a pole no one else knows about. That ties in with the sand. Right. Paint the sand yellow again. Okay, let’s get this show on the road. ‘Scott of the Sahara.’