Understanding Engineers #1
Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one
said, “Where did you get such a great bike?”
The second engineer replied, “Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding
my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to
the ground, took off all her clothes and said, “Take what you want.”
The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, “Good choice: The clothes
probably wouldn’t have fit you anyway.”
Understanding Engineers #2
To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is
half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Understanding Engineers #3
A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, “What’s with those
guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!”
The doctor chimed in, “I don’t know, but I’ve never seen such inept golf!”
The priest said, “Here comes the greens-keeper. Let’s have a word with him.”
He said, “Hello George, What’s wrong with that group ahead of us? They’re
rather slow, aren’t they?”
The greens-keeper replied, “Oh, yes. That’s a group of blind firemen. They
lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always
let them play for free anytime!.”
The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, “That’s so sad. I think
I will say a special prayer for them tonight.”
The doctor said, “Good idea. I’m going to contact my ophthalmologist
colleague and see if there’s anything she can do for them.”
The engineer said, “Why can’t they play at night?”