Cruelty is an aspect of the oppressor, not the victim.
I never took a sledge hammer to a car because I thought it would suffer. I never pulled the legs off a daddy longlegs as a kid because I thought it would suffer.
And my cats don’t skin and eat bunnies alive because they think the bunny will suffer.
Then I agree, you weren't being cruel. You're just mentally ill, and I have compassion for that.
And my cats dont skin and eat bunnies alive because they think the bunny will suffer.
Cats are aliens, and they are taking over the world.