What I plan to do is first become educated; then try various models with a certified trainer; and narrow down my choices and preferences for my eventual purchase. Once I've made my decision I'll only buy a firearm I am well trained on and can keep legally, whether I live in Manhattan, or move to Long Island, Westchester County, or New Jersey (these are all very close).
This thread is a great learning experience, and I'm grateful for the guidance. The biggest lesson for both myself and veteran gun owners is this:
Everyone American has to start where they are, whether their knowledge and experience is high, intermediate, or next to nothing. We cannot deny someone's constitutional rights because they start with little or no experience. Instead we should honor their rights and help them exercise their rights according to their ability.
No one should give up pursuing responsible gun ownership due to age or lack of experience. Rather, start where you are, build what you know, and follow the advice of experienced gun owners while obeying the law. Even starting at zero is fine, if you truly recognize that you are at zero, and have certified trainers and close friends who know you to keep you in check and build concrete, measurable skills while you journey to mastery.
With enough work I know I will have enough proficiency to buy the revolver or semi or rifle that is right for me.
One thing I forgot to mention last night about the .357/.38 caliber revolver. Marlin makes a great lever action rifle in.357 also so you might take that into consideration. pistol, rifle, one ammo.