In my home, they’d find no corpse to arrest.
Nice garden! How'd you get it to grow so well?
If it were in my house, like yours’, there would be no corpse to arrest. I’d just call my local raccoon and tell him carry out’s here.
Sneakly SOAG (Son of a Gun, or was it the female one), opened up a large plastic top-snap-locked container and ate some of the dog food in it last night.
Got to admire the raccoons, they are smart.