Is this done anonymously? Obviously your responses were not. Even so, why would any company allow this, or (sorry, not ragging on you as I thing your morals and heart were in the right place) why would anyone with common sense choose to participate?
At every company I’ve ever worked for where they’ve had a company intranet or even something like a SharePoint site, content is strictly controlled and limited and moderated and only for things pertaining to company business - company announcements, or internal information such as links to IT docs such as “how to program your office phone for out of office messages”, “how to order business cards”, etc., HR information like various HR forms, HR policies, internal job postings or links to benefit providers / insurance carriers; in the case of SharePoint or Box - shared documents for project teams and restricted only to those on that project team only project related docs.
Where I currently work, we don’t even allow employees to post flyers on the cafeteria bulletin board; things like posts for personal items they want to sell, solicitations for charitable causes, “walk-a-thons”, Girl Scout Cookies sign-up sheets, unless it has a literal stamp of approval from HR. And we deny just as much as we approve - it can’t be for or to promote a for-profit business (Tupperware, Avon, Longerburger Baskets, jewelry book sales, etc.) or of a “dubious” charitable cause or purpose, or to promote your Church, Mosque, Hindu Temple….or for any political candidates or causes. We do sometimes allow flyers for church sponsored fundraisers but for only something along the lines of raising funds for a kid with cancer, but the kid must be from our local community and the employee must have some sort of personal relationship with family and the flyer has to state that 100% of any contributions goes to the family or a registered charity for that purpose only and can’t have overtly religious undertones. i.e. - proselytizing.
And just so everyone knows, not long ago, we denied a flyer that one of our employees who is Hindu wanted to post about a speech and book signing at his Hindu temple by some Hindu author. Part of the proceeds from the book sale was allegedly going to some charity, but that didn’t pass our policy as most of % of the book sales were for the author’s own profit and it was promoting Hinduism, the small % allegedly being donated to a charity was only secondary.
”the instant message conversation”
Again, why are employees engaging in personal conversations and soliciting advice on personal matters on company time using company resources? Why is this company allowing it all? In all companies where I’ve ever worked, using IM’s and using company email or computers and internet access for personal matters was strictly forbidden and against our Electronic Communications and Internet Usage policies.
I totally get your frustrations in that your opinions and advice are being singled out by your company’s PC Police while other PC POV’s are not and even that your company is promoting certain PC causes and stifling opposing views. I get that. I really do. It is unfair. But IMO, from someone with over 30 years in HR, that is the result of a very bad and poorly enforced company policy to begin with. You might have a case for a labor attorney, but it’s probably not worth the additional grief and $ it will cost you. My advice is don’t participate, don’t engage in the personal advice seeking, keep your views to yourself while on company time, in the meantime, do the very best job you can possibly do and starting looking for another job with a company more competently managed and do it ASAP.
I will also echo what ozarkgirl said; “co-workers are not "friends", they are co-workers.” Don’t fall into the trap that just because you have a good work relationship with a co-worker, that they are your friend. I can’t tell you how many people I’ve worked with over the years who pretended to be my BBF at work, who would also stab in the back in a NY minute given the chance, or once I left the company for another job, never wanted anything to do with me again. Not all, but many. I am on FB, mostly to keep touch with “real life” friends and relatives, many now living out of state. But I have my FB preferences set up so that only my friends or those I select can see my posts. I also make it a personal policy, never, ever to have any current co-workers as FB friends. If I get a request, I politely decline.
I will also relate a story about a woman who at a previous job, which was not in an HR dept, was my direct report. She had a lot of performance issues, i.e. really not performing her job up to standards but also very erratic in how she performed her job – one day doing an OK job, then the next making inexplicable mistakes as if it was her first day on the job along with attendance issues. And she also had issues with other employees, sometimes saying odd and rather disjointed and disturbing things to them and acting in other rather bizarre manners with other co-workers, suddenly shouting at them for no apparent reason one minute and then inviting them to come to dinner at her house the next, including one time just after a company meeting, “sexually harassing” the owner of the company by grinding up against him in a very suggestive way and calling him a “sexy beast”. People who saw it were shocked and dumbfounded and offended, live alone the owner of the company. He was livid.
He was about to fire her on the spot but I and the HR manager decided to have the formal “you were given your last chance” meeting and give her final written reprimand as this wasn’t her first time being written up and being “counseled”. We wanted to make sure we had sufficient documentation and cause to fire her, which we were anticipating doing at that meeting since we also anticipated that she would not react well, even to the point we had one of young guys in our office stand outside the meeting room in case she became violent.
During the meeting in which our HR manager also was present for, we kept things very professional and factual and provided her with her prior and signed warnings including her last chance written warning and the specifics of her most recent issues, the performance and attendance issues and her most recent actions – “molesting the boss” and explained exactly how and why they violated what company policy and let her know why this was resulting in her termination.
She then started talking and rambling on about how she was “bi-polar” and “sometimes” was on meds, how she was a victim of incest – her father had molested her and how her husband was an alcoholic, her one son had come “out” and her daughter had become a Wiccan or a Goth or just dressed weird – it was hard to tell what she was really talking about.
The HR manager and I stopped her from continuing this line of conversation. First of all, while we both felt sorry and sympathized with her messed up life, we didn’t want to hear about her personal issues, especially her claim of being bi-polar as we were concerned that she might use it in a wrongful termination suit – she was probably “crazy” but not necessarily stupid. But secondly we also pointed out to her that the company had a free and strictly confidential EAP program and if she was having at home personal issues that impacted her job performance, that was the proper place to address it, and that in a prior meeting, we had even asked her to get a referral for counseling with the EAP and that she had never followed through.
At the end of the day, talking about sensitive personal issues with your co-workers or your boss at work or giving counseling to them, is a very, very bad idea all around.
Agree with EVERYTHING you wrote. Thanks for the ping.
How do you phrase it and how do they respond?
I take it she had to sign something acknowledging she's read it and been counseled. What is your recourse if the counseled person refuses to sign?