[Lucky9teen]

[Lucky9teen]

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CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST

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[ShadowAce]

Woohoo!! Finally!!!!

[FroggyTheGremlim]

Gee, next year it will be

Super Bowl L

[TADSLOS]

Top 20!

[CPOSharky]

SENIOR TRYING TO SET PASSWORD

WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.

USER: cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.

USER: boiled cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.

USER: 1 boiled cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.

USER: 50bloodyboiledcabbages

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character.

USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.

USER: 50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon’tGiveMeAccessNow!

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.

USER: ReallyPissedOff50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow

WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.

[verga]

A man is walking along the beach one day and he finds a magic lamp, he rubs it and a Genie appears. The genie tells him that he gets three wishes, and his worst enemy will get twice as much.

He wishes for a big mansion, his enemy gets two. He wishes for a million dollars his enemy get two.

Finally he says. "I want to be beaten half to death."

[Clay Moore]

My son asked me the other day, “If Apple builds a car, will it have windows?”

[a fool in paradise]

Band On The Run

[TexasCajun]

[W.]

[reed13k]

In

[martin_fierro]

[fredhead]

Finally in!! Just got off an overnight underway on one of our great Navy ships!!! And it’s my birthday!!!! The Navy tried to take away another birthday but didn’t totally succeed.

I love the Navy.

[relentlessly]

A husband went to the sheriff’s department to report that his wife was missing.

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home.

Sergeant: What is her height?
Husband: Gee, I’m not sure. A little over five-feet tall.

Sergeant: Weight?
Husband: Don’t know. Not slim, not really fat.

Sergeant: Color of eyes?
Husband: Never noticed.

Sergeant: Color of hair?
Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown.

Sergeant: What was she wearing?
Husband: Could have been a skirt or shorts. I don’t remember exactly.

Sergeant: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.

Sergeant: What kind of truck was it?
Husband: Brand new 2015 Ford F150 King Ranch 4X4 with eco-boost 5.0L V8 engine special ordered with manual transmission. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed. Custom leather seats and “Bubba” floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch. DVD with navigation, 21-channel CB radio, six cup holders, and four power outlets. Added special alloy wheels and off-road Michelins. Wife put a small scratch on the drivers door.

At this point the husband started choking up.
Sergeant: Don’t worry buddy. We’ll find your truck

[relentlessly]

[Baynative]

[llevrok]