[TalonDJ]

Okay, he spends a few minutes asking for sex, but probably didn't spend much time wooing her.

Look at it from his perspective. He could spend a while trying to get her warmed up and then he gets shot down... or he could just ask and get shot down right away. Saves time.

Why does he have to do all the work? He has to work hard to get her fired up, then he had to do a larger share of the physical work (in some standard in face configurations). Why? Shouldn't she actually put in some effort? Sorry ladies, but if you shot a man down 9 times out of time he is not going to see foreplay as a worthwhile investment. Put out even when you are not that interested and he will be more interested in listening to your needs. He just does not care that much about your needs when his aren't even close to being met. In the grand scheme of things YOUR needs are a lot more work than his. So have some perspective. It is well documented that the less sex women get they less they want. So denying him to hold out for more attention is a losing proposition.

[Night Hides Not]

They've been married two years, together for five, no kids. My advice to the guy is get a divorce.

I've been married 25+ years. It's difficult to "woo" a woman who constantly points out your flaws, whether it be "putting her on a pedestal", helping around the house, spending time with the kids, etc. All the while, her check is her money, my check is "our money." I also understand that I'm not the easy guy to live with.

I still love her, and we do have our moments. There are so many joys in my life, and understand the grass is always greener on the other side.

[baltiless]

So much just depends on personal chemistry. Given that I’m both new here and have no particular desire to relate too many details of my life, I’ll just say that I was married for 17 years to a woman who had little interest in sex and eventually came to believe it was on me. I finally divorced a year ago, met a lovely woman in November, and no, it’s not me. And maybe it wasn’t the ex, either. Some people just don’t have that kind of chemistry.