I wouldn't consider Wyoming, Montana or Idaho. I make no bones about being a city boy. I need a metro area with at least a million people (6 million where I live) to be happy.
IMO you should counter-propose Denver.
It’s big enough for your threshold. Civilized enough for her.
Tries to act redneck enough for you, but nobody really takes it too serious.
Honestly. Denver.
Colorado will still be in operation, long after Cali has declared BK.
To each his own.
Personally, I don’t think happiness CAN be found in a big city. I live outside of Atlanta. A good 35 miles east. The closer you get, the sadder and more desperate it gets, until you get to the center where the sports arenas and attractions are.
But every major city is run by hypocrats that mismanage with a vengeance. Every decade after every decade the dims promise the poor (and everyone else) that the hypocrat party is the answer to their poverty, yet the Detroits and LAs and Atlantas are more run down, poorer and more crippled with abandoned neighborhoods and businesses and crime than the decade before.
I think the answer is a more moderately sized metro area with more conservatives and sane people as you put it. You might not want to go to those states but think hard about all the “sane people” that are leaving your target states for these very areas.
If you’re truly looking to be around sane people, you’re heading against the flow of traffic!
Once again, GOOD LUCK! I was going to say you need it but the truth is WE ALL DO!