Why Beer Is Better Than Obama?
“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” —Benjamin Franklin
Beer is better than Obama because
... soldiers like beer.
... sailors like beer.
... marines like beer.
... beer doesn’t come from Madrassas.
... you know what’s in beer.
... beer won’t take half your paycheck.
... beer makes life a little better.
... you’re sad if there’s no more beer.
... beer doesn’t lie.
... beer doesn’t have entitlement demands.
... beer and whine don’t mix.
... beer has a pretty good head on it.
... beer and bowling go together.
... beer and arugula don’t.
... beer doesn’t leave a bad taste in your mouth.
... beer doesn’t mind if you cling to your beer.
... beer doesn’t trash talk you behind your back.
... cold beer disproves the myth of man made global warming.
... imported beer doesn’t pretend to be domestic.
... beer likes it when I set my thermostat COLD.
... beer is GREEN only on St. Patrick’s Day.
... beer didn’t smoke pot and snort coke.
... beer is better than Vichy Water.
... beer is unpretentious.
... people in small towns cling to God, guns and beer.
... beer doesn’t promise you a free lunch.
... there ain’t no Pabst Bilal* Ribbon. Not yet anyway.
*”Bilal - Satisfies thirst; name of the Prophets Muezzin (one who calls for prayer)”
... beer won’t throw you under the bus.
... beer doesn’t cut and run.
... beer isn’t phony.
... beer doesn’t flip-flop.
... beer’s ingredients known for sure.
... beer makes people happy.
... beer is as American as apple pie.
... beer isn’t promoted on National Public Radio.
... beer doesn’t mind if you own an SUV.
... beer doesn’t care how much you make.
... a beer won’t blame America for 9/11.
... beer doesn’t whine, it bubbles.
... beer isn’t a lawyer.
... beer comes with an expiration date.
... beer and NASCAR go together.
... you’re not afraid to turn your back on a beer.
... beers don’t have friends who bombed the pentagon.
... an empty beer is better than an empty suit.
... beer minds its own business.
... beer doesn’t tell you what you want to hear.
... beer is worth what you pay for it.
... beer doesn’t lecture you about “global warming.”
... beer doesn’t care what color you are.
... beer doesn’t want to take away your gun.
... beer is popular with working people.
... beer isn’t crazy.
... beers don’t start out as empties.
... beers don’t rig elections.
... beers don’t raise taxes.
... beer and coke don’t mix.
This is an oldie, but it still brings a little chuckle.
During one of her daily classes, a teacher trying to teach good manners,
Asked her students the following question:
“Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how
Would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”
Michael said, “Just a minute I have to go pee.”
The teacher responded by saying, “That would be rude and impolite.What
About you Sherman, how would you say it?”
Sherman said, “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be
Right back.”
“That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the
Dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and
Show us your good manners?” “I would say: Darling, may I please be excused
For a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I
Hope to introduce you to after dinner.”
The teacher fainted...