Posted on 01/16/2009 5:16:26 AM PST by Lucky9teen
Dear Tech Support ,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as:
· Romance 9.5 and
· Personal Attention 6.5
And then installed undesirable programs such as :
· NBA 5.0
· NFL 3.0 and
· Golf Clubs 4.1
Also Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate.
DEAR DESPERATE ,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If that application works as designed , Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5 , Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1
Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 - program these are unsupported applications and will crash H usband 1.0 .
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend
Cooking 3.0 and
Hot Lingerie 7.7
Good Luck!
Tech Support
very funny
As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember
1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written
An impressive new book. It’s called .........
‘Ministers Do More Than Lay People’
2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink
And be Mary.
3. The difference between the Pope and
Your boss, the Pope only expects you
To kiss his ring.
4. My mind works like lightning, One brilliant
Flash and it is gone.
5. The only time the world beats a path to
Your door is if you’re in the bathroom.
6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once.
The seat folded up, the drink spilled and
That ice, well, it really chilled the mood.
7. It used to be only death and taxes
Now, of course, there’s
shipping and handling, too.
8.. A husband is someone who, after taking
the trash out, gives the impression that
he just cleaned the whole house.
9 My next house will have no kitchen - just
Vending machines and a large trash can.
10. A blonde said, ‘I was worried that my
Mechanic might try to rip me off.
I was relieved when he told me all
I needed was turn signal fluid.’
11. Definition of a teenager?
God’s punishment...for enjoying sex.
12. As you slide down the banister of life, may
The splinters never point the wrong way.
Love it!!!
A woman thought a little light-weight bondage might liven up her married life, so when her husband came home she met him at the door in a filmy nightgown, handed him some silk ropes, and told him, “If you tie me up you can do whatever you want.” So he tied her up and went to a sports bar.
Two weeks later the same woman screeched her tires into the driveway, ran inside and shouted, “Honey, I won the lottery, pack your things.”
“That’s great, he said, “should I pack for the mountains or the beach?”
‘It doesn’t matter,” she said, “just get out!”
You could get flocked...
You know, this is the time of year when guys regret having shaved their bodies.
I’m borrowing for a while it’s soo good
Knock yourself out. I just googled it up myself ;o)
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