For those that are curious but don’t want to drive traffic to the link:
1.I’ll be out of the office all day Wednesday in solidarity with women worldwide. You should take a screenshot of this email as it’s now a piece of history. Thanks!
2.I will be out of office all day Wednesday fighting for social justice. I’ll be returning to the office to fight for the same thing but harder on Thursday, March 9.
3.I will be out of the office all day Wednesday striking on behalf of women everywhere, because come on now why do you even need a because.
4.Please forgive any delays in my response time. I’m out of office today at the Women’s Strike and will have access to email but have pledged not to check it until I return. Of course, I will very likely check my email because this whole strike thing makes me very nervous but I will maybe not respond to your email until Thursday morning, assuming I don’t I freak out first. Thanks! Don’t email any more!
5.I will be out of the office on Wednesday, March 8 to participate in the Women’s Strike. If you need immediate assistance, find your nearest benign man and ask him to do it instead.
6.I will be out of office beginning Wednesday March 8 for the Women’s Strike and will do my best not to return.
7.Thank you for your email. Your email is important to me but not nearly as important as striking for women, which is what I’ll be doing today.
8.I will be striking on Wednesday March 8 on behalf of women. If you need to know why I can’t help you so please email someone else.
9.I will be out of office Wednesday, March 8, for the Women’s Strike. If you need me I’ll be wandering around town surrounded by raging older women in pussy hats, so for your own safety, please just contact my boss.
10.I will be out of the office on Wednesday, March 8 in order to destroy the patriarchy. I will return to work to tragically uphold it again on Thursday, March 9.
11.I will be out of office today out of solidarity with all oppressed groups. I will respond to your message when it becomes as important as this.
12.I will be out of the office on Wednesday, March 8, to participate in the Women’s Strike. Please don’t email me because I will feel really compelled to reply because I’m a woman who does her job.
13.Thank for you your message. I will be out of the office on Wednesday, March 8 to make history. If you need me, come join me! We need you there.
If my pasting the items is a violation of any FR rules, please remove this comment.
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