" At Princeton, Michele and I took intellectually challenging courses like Black Is Beautiful, How To Intimidate Employers with The Civil Rights Act, Getting Ahead Using Your Skin Color, with graduate studies in Pay-Me-I'm-A-Victim methodologies.
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OBAMA CALLS Mrs O: "Before she pocketed some of the billion dollars, your pal shoulda told us they didn't teach web site construction at Princeton."
SECY SIBELIUS TO OBAMA: "While you're on your brand new brick phone, Mr President, get a few more cases of these cute floppy disks Mrs O's Princeton classmate provided."
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During the web site crisis, Mrs O displayed her usual “tolerance and compassion” (sob). She ordered the WH kitchen to provide the hardworking fix-it team with glass carafes of Chock-ful-of-Nuts coffee heated on bunsen burners, cans of evaporated milk, packets of aspartame, and fresh-made donuts fried in olestra.